Each Life that Touches ours

Yesterday was the birthday of my cousin's step-brother's wife, who was killed in a tragic car accident just a couple of weeks ago, leaving behind a husband and 3 young boys about the same ages as my children. I ached for those boys, for their grandmother, daddy, and all others who knew her. I don't believe I ever carried on a conversation with Aaron, yet I was still very affected by her sudden death. I have been thinking a lot about how we are all so intertwined with each other.

A few weeks ago, in Sunday school we were talking about our covenant to "Mourn with those that mourn, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort." I asked my class (16-18 year old youth) What the difference was between mourning with others, and comforting others. One wise young man, Tom said something to the effect of, "When you mourn with others, you get down in their sorrow with them, and then you are in a position to comfort them." It is so true. In your moments of deepest sorrow, you turn to those who have been through it before, those who truly know what you are going through.

A few years ago, my brother was in the hospital, and it didn't look good. I remember feeling angry when people would tell me everything was going to be okay. "You don't know that," I thought, "And what if it isn't?"

I really did appreciate, however, the countless people who called just to say that they were sorry, they loved us, and that we were in their prayers--especially those that had been through similar experiences and could offer insight. I made a list of those who called so that my brother would know how many people cared about him and were affected by his life. I filled a couple of legal pad pages with names--some of whom didn't really know him like my grandmother's boss, etc.. I was surprised at how many lives are connected to one life of an ordinary person.

I have thought about that over and over in the weeks past as I have heard about one heart-ache after another, and I have hurt along with them. A couple of years ago when a 5th grader in our stake, whom I did not know, was hit by a car and killed, I mourned. (I still think of the boy and his family every time I drive past that spot near our home.) Then, I hoped that somehow my hurting would ease the pain of his family, but I think Tom from my class has it better figured out. Our life experiences prepare us to help those around us- I believe that my aunt and cousins (who lost their husband and father young) will be in positions to help this grieving family, where others may not. For without knowing the pain, we wouldn't be in a position to help ease it. That is why the Savior suffered all, to be in a position to get down in the depths of despair with us and lift us out. Hopefully I will learn to do the same.